I won’t lie – when the trade for Jonathan Sanchez occurred, I was happy. We got a young, hard throwing left-handed pitcher who had success in the post season for the Giants for an older player who was past his prime. What caught me off guard was Sanchez’s complete inability to command any pitch in his arsenal. We thought we were getting a future solid number two or three starter, instead we got a little league shortstop who’s forced on the mound because the real pitcher ran out of innings. Games in which he was on the mound were boring as hell, moved at a snails pace, and was generally bad baseball.
Sanchez was so bad that even with his tremendous upside, the Royals traded him for Jeremy Guthrie – a player with a career 4.36 ERA, and a win/loss percentage of 67.5%. Through his first three starts with the Royals, Guthrie never made it past the sixth inning and posted an 8.76 ERA. At this point, anyone who would have considered the Royals winning the Melky trade could have a spot next to The Joker in Arkham Asylum.
Oh, how so much can change in such a short amount of time. Giants fans went from circle jerking themselves to Joe Esposito’s “You’re The Best” to wallowing in self pity while listening to this. Melky Cabrera’s 50-game suspension for using a banned substance is now well publicized. The man had more testosterone in him than a female Albanian weightlifter.
What is even funnier, or sadder (I haven’t decided after hours of deliberation), is his attempted cover up. Yep, Melky tried to use a fake website that featured a fake product to get him off the hook. Did he really think that was going to work? I knew that kind of stuff wouldn’t work after eighth grade when I created a fake girlfriend online to impress my friends. It took a couple days for a group of 13 year old kids to figure it out, so I’m not surprised MLB officials immediately noticed the smoke screen of bullshit Melky was trying to put up.
On the Royals side, Jeremy Guthrie is pitching like a machine. In Guthrie’s last two starts before today, he has looked like the pseudo-ace the Royals have been desperately trying to find. Look at the stats;
IP: 15.0
Hits: 8
Runs: 0
Walks: 2
Strikeouts: 14
Today he took a no-hitter into the seventh inning before giving up his first hit and consequently two runs. If I can calculate this correctly, that means he went 21 straight innings without giving up a run. As a Royals’ fan who has had to watch some of the most abysmal pitching any fan has had to suffer through for the past decade – this renaissance has been good to the eyes. What makes me most ecstatic, however, is the Royals got rid of Jonathan Sanchez for a guy who only walked two guys in two games.
At this point, it seems as though the Royals will get the spoils from the Melky trade, and it only took 3/4 of the season. In retrospect, the Royals traded a Porsche for an invisible car. Somehow, after a couple months trying to drive it, they were able to trade the invisible car for a Prius. Making things sweeter, a week later the Porsche’s engine blew up. Now the Giants have a Porsche without an engine, the Rockies have an invisible car, and although the Royals may not get laid a lot – at least they have a Prius that will run.
Joshua Jackson
@JoshJackson_TID
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